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Adria Cabey was born in Oklahoma. She has written for Artistic Verses, an annual publication released by the Peninsula Fine Arts Center in Virginia.
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The first reason is that the statement contains what I find to be a logical fallacy.

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To argue that people should continue to come to church despite the messy people there simply because they put up with messy people in the club is like arguing that someone should continue to patronize a roach infested restaurant because they work at an insect zoo. The church is not supposed to be the club, and if I expect messy people at the club I do not have to expect messy people at church. And here is where part of the problem lies. For too long we have held the church out as a place where people have attained, instead of a place where people are still growing.


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Moreover, we have not done a good enough job of shielding the most vulnerable among us from those who through their words and their actions can do serious and lasting damage. If we were more honest about what a church is then people would not have unrealistic expectations about the interactions they may experience.

Lessons on Church Folk Volume 1 by Antoinette Davis - FictionDB

My second reason comes in the form of a theological query — what is it exactly that makes the church a unique, special, and mandatory place for Christian community? This genuinely confuses me. Sometimes as Adventists and Christians we act as if weekly church attendance is the only way you can have a relationship with Christ and a Christian community. Especially if their local church has become a setting for emotional trauma. Third and finally, I think the original statement engages in misguided victim blaming. The main problem in the case of the lapsed member and the church folk is not the person who left the church.

The issue is with the church folk who mistreated that person and caused them to not want to be there. To blame the person who left is to abdicate our responsibility as the church to love and care for the souls entrusted to our care. Instead the church should be a welcoming place where people can come to draw close to Christ, learn and grow, and find a loving community that will protect and care for them as they go through that process.

Or the one that recognizes the possibility that someone might actually be treated better at the club than they are at church. At the same time, a change in culture and maybe even theology is warranted as well. It is also true that some of these negative interactions are based not only in how we act, but what we believe.

He is also an assistant professor at Adventist University of Health Sciences. We invite you to join our community through conversation by commenting below.

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We ask that you engage in courteous and respectful discourse. How it is a gift from God, and that there is nothing I can do to earn Salvation I have walked in a greater grace from the Lord.

Everyday I pray for His grace and mercy and that He leads me. I read the Bible and pray without it being a burden. He wants me to come to Him in my need, my pain, my sorrow, my shame, my joys all of it. I bring it to Him and lay it at His feet and He carries me. Going to mass each Sunday is not a burden at all. I feel so fulfilled after I go. My week is also more orderly and I feel I have more of His grace for the week. I have not become a Catholic. Am I going to become Catholic?

If the Lord is leading me in that direction then I will follow. Also, the Lord has softened my heart towards the protestant church, and tells me not to judge His people. Anyway, sorry for the long message, I just read your post and it sounded like me a few years ago. So maybe you should try mass. It seems what you are seeking, is what believers hunger for, the scriptures, and what unbelievers seek but do not yet know that they seek it.

If you do come across this post. I would really enjoy to talk more with you. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. Here are 10 reasons why. Higher engagement in our churches means people are more regularly interacting with the church. And if we the Church are modeling our lives after Christ, then those who are engaged with us at church gatherings should naturally be growing to become more like Jesus and less like themselves.


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  • Or maybe he just came to your church to be polite. So, overall churches should never tell another person what they need or what they should want in a church. Everyone will some day need to answer to God on their judgment day, but it does not mean they need to answer to every random member in a congregation. I know that from my experience with people in church is that they get into small talk, but never want to take time to have real conversations.

    Get to know a person first! Without fishing for information, find out five things about a person, and make the effort to remember. I feel that people have a much better association with people when they take the time to know the person and learn about his interests and concerns. MACK myself. He actually did it for me just as I read about him on the internet.

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    He is worth giving a try. He is well Known all over the world, especially in restoring broken Marriage and relationship. You can contact Dr. Although attendance is not the goal or mission of our church, it is an important part of who we […]. I have a strange twist on 4 in my current location — many families with young children and both parents work non-traditional jobs read not so the children are not in day care. This changes Sunday worship attendance, leadership involvement, ongoing spiritual formation groups, and Bible study.

    I also agree with other commenters about it not always being about affluence. Thanks be to God that He is in control. Now, to lean into Him and listen for direction … creative direction and the guts to take the risks. I agree! The church staff also mailed a letter to my home, stating how much I contributed monetarily in I felt insulted and discouraged. My relationship with Jesus is very strong and will continue. Feelings come and go and change all the time. Many people today are lazy and want everything done for them.

    Jesus said he hid the mysteries of the Gospel for us not from us. Also as far as the statement for charitable contributions. If you feel insulted or discouraged try giving more and doing more. My wife and I have been regular church attenders to a fault and engaged to a fault for the first 41 of our 43 years of married life and for the years prior to our marriage.

    Sunday morning 9AM and 11AM services are well-attended. Your request for avoiding a rant is difficult to define in terms of where the boundary is between being negative and a rant. I have come to this page twice and walked away because what I was about to write had and has a degree of negativity. So, at the risk of being un-positive, I will be forthright. That discussion usually comes to no real conclusions.

    The preaching content is solid but the last 25 minutes of the 45 minutes is unnerving. I often retreat to the car to wait out the intense sound levels but I can still follow along in the car parked some distance away. I often come home after the service with frayed nerves and the unanswered question about what to do. Our daughter and husband ask similar questions about why they go to church services even though they are more-than fully-engaged in their church.

    And, my worship is really how I live my days; not my regular attendance where I am merely a spectator. I believe that for many decades we have gone to church for other than ideal or preferable reasons. The methods have changed but painting the house a new color has not addressed the problem of the broken windows.

    Good news is, He does!